Faith…you give it to the people you love, but the people who really deserve it are the ones who come through even when you don’t love them enough.
It’s a quote from one of my favorite shows ever, Veronica Mars, which I felt compelled to scribble in the back of an old notebook. I read it over and over, because although I must have written this several years ago, it still rings true today.
Love – we use it nonchalantly and generously and carelessly so we instill all of our faith in people we think we love. We do it so that they’ll love us back, don’t we? We use any excuse to give away our love. We give them our all. Blindly, we trust that they will take care of us and our ceaseless needs. We assure ourselves that they will never hurt us. We enshrine them. Everything they do is singular, peerless. We bow down before them, we submit. All on the wish, the simple hope that they will do the same for us.
And most of the time, what happens? Turns out the ones we try to impress are always the ones who fail us the most. They ruthlessly take all it is we give – and sometimes more – while expending not an ounce of themselves.
What about those who truly love us, who would indeed walk to the ends of the world for us? Those who put all of their faith in us? How is it that we repay them? They’re burdensome to us. They aren’t in our prayers. When we go to La Salette, we don’t light a candle for them. We give them an empty kind of love, a love that’s transparent and meager, weak. We don’t care if they love us. Their love is dispensable. It’s not enough, ever. We make sure to let them know, with displays of ingratitude and indifference. They are to us what we are to those we worship.
And most of the time, what happens? Turns out, they are the ones that save us, pick us up and breathe life back into us when our fake gods fail to hear our prayers and leave us to die, rendered faithless.