Learning Objectives.

I’ve given it some thought and there can only be one answer: you had not a damn clue. Cause there’s no way you would leave me out here:

  • making emo playlists like a teenager and listening to them during work meetings;
  • putting on a suit of armor before I walk out the door in an attempt to be impenetrable, lest someone pierce through and finish shattering me once and for all;
  • marred by feelings of inadequacy and self-doubt at the thought that the one person I thought most highly of could disregard me so easily;
  • thinking back to the day I watched your skin darken under the sun and realized I carried the burden of loving you in my past lives, the present, and thus would be the fate of my future selves;
  • exhausted and embarrassed in this game of wack ass Clue, connecting dots that were never really there;
  • with a sadness which has inevitably forged itself into an icendiary rage which underlies everything I do, ready to punch and scream in a desperate attempt to transfer this onto someone else. It propels me and you’re smart to not look me in the eye cause I’d Cyclops your ass.

There’s no way you knew how much I loved you. You just mustn’t have. Impossible. Because the alternative – that you always knew yet used it against me and willingly left me naufraga – is too much to bear.

*Here’s a playlist for those initiated into the heartbreak hotel. I love Shawn Mendes and Sam Smith but who hurt them?! It ain’t right.*

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